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Notes: Part of the foursome universe. Follows in order of

appearance: A Christmas wish, a new love, that's what friends are

for, Popsicle toes, twister, tangled up in blue, the list, the jazz

singer, debut, meet the neighbors, war games, the art of seduction,

summer's end, what are you doing New year's eve?, ruminations, in

dreams; one martini, two martini, three martini, floor; the dinner

party, fleeting moments, garage sale, feels like home.

The information about Scully's family was gleaned from internet

sources. I don't remember much about her brothers except for

that jerk-off Bill. He made an impression as he does here.

This is being posted way past the Christmas holidays but you know

what us procrastinators say, better late than never!

I found the "alien love child" on the blowfish site.

Warning: Besides bad language, it contains homophobic and racial


Archive: Okay to DitB, WWOMB, fullhouse slash, anyone else just

ask first.

The snow crunched beneath their feet, thick-soled boots sinking

through the crust of ice and into the soft layer it covered. Their

breath puffed out in small circles of fog that whispered away into

the cold, crisp air into nothing.

John and Walter were laden down with boxes. Alex carried several

bags of food while Fox had the gift bags.

Maggie opened the door and welcomed them in, hustling them out of

the cold. Her medium length dark hair whipped around her pale face

in the wind. She clutched at her light blue cardigan to keep the

cold at bay.

Fox gave her a hug and her smile made crinkles appear around her


"Gamma, gamma!" Will called. "Da da!" he shouted upon seeing Fox

and his companions. The toddler ran towards his smiling father.

To Will they were all dada at the moment. They were still trying

to figure out if he should call the other three by their names or if

each man should be called by a separate title.

Walter liked papa for himself just because it seemed fitting as he

was the oldest. John wasn't too sure about the whole thing and Alex

was bewildered about parenthood. He was good at playing with Will

and even when it came to taking care of his basic needs like feeding

or singing him to sleep but being a stepfather amazed him.

The three men arranged gifts under the tree after greeting Will.

Fox picked him up and snuggled on the sofa with him.

"Hey Fox, " Monica greeted him and gave him a hug. "Dana's in

the kitchen. Merry Christmas."

"Merry Christmas." He hugged her back and Will joined in the


"Oh, Alex you didn't have to make so much," Maggie admonished.

She peeked into the plastic bags.

Alex shrugged and blushed. "No trouble. I love to cook for family."

"Come in the kitchen and I'll help you get this stuff put away. Dana

is stirring all the lumps out of my gravy."

"I'm sure your gravy doesn't have any lumps at all."

"Aren't you sweet?"

"He's a real charmer," Walter agreed and gave Alex a bear hug from

behind. Alex squeezed his hand and nuzzled back. He was very

pleased by this public display of affection from Walter. He gave

him a peck on the cheek in thanks and followed Maggie into the


Dana's red hair gleamed as the sun shone through the window and

struck the sleek, auburn head. He set the bags down and began to

pluck out the dishes and Tupperware.

He greeted Dana and she offered him a half hug while continuing to


"I've got tiramisu, plus lemon squares and butter tarts and I picked

up some cannoli at the Italian bakery. Oh and a box of chocolates."

He pulled out a gourmet box of truffles.

"You know my weaknesses."

"We also brought some liquid refreshments. This is for the hostess."

He took out a fancy gift bag.

"You didn't have to do that." Maggie slapped his arm lightly.

"It's the least we could do." He slid out a few bottles of red wine

as well.

She untied the ribbon and pulled out a bottle of Bailey's Irish

Cream. "Umm, perfect. I was running low. Thank you."

"I figure we could have an ounce or two in our coffee later," he

joked. "You know, reduce that holiday stress."

Maggie laughed and patted his arm. She put the bottle next to the

coffee maker.

"Now this is more like it," Scully said as she studied a bottle of

the wine.

Monica wandered back in. In her chocolate brown jeans and matching

turtleneck she appeared even taller than she was. She towered over

Dana and read the label over her shoulder. "This looks interesting.

Ontario vineyard. Red, my favorite." She played with the exotic

chain around her neck.

"How did I know this?"

"You're psychic?" Monica suggested.

"Naw, that's your department."

"Speaking of psychics, Fox asked me to co-write an article for a

science magazine."

"He's been wanting to ask you for a while."

They heard the sounds of squealing and laughter from the next room.

"Will's showing the guys his toys."

"He got into some of his gifts this morning."

"Does he know what's going on?"

"Not really. But the present idea is okay with him." Scully smiled

at Alex and went back to stirring. She picked up the glass of white

wine at her side. The champagne colored liquid was gone in one

smooth gulp. "Holiday stress," she explained.

"We're awaiting the arrival of her brothers," Monica explained.

"Ah, the big family reunion huh? I wonder how they'll react to

seeing me here half the day."

"If either one of them gives you any trouble, just smack them."

"They're your brothers, Scully."

"Which means they deserve a good belt across the face. I've had

enough bigotry and hatred to last a lifetime." She smiled again

and this time the smile reached her blue-gray eyes.

"Me too," Alex agreed. "I'll take over in here if you want to join

the rest of the family in the den."

"Sure. Here, have some wine." She poured out a small glass of

wine that had a funny picture of a hippo or pig on the label.

Alex made himself at home in the kitchen while Dana took Monica's

proffered arm. In her other hand she held the bottle of wine she

had been drinking.

Maggie and Alex worked in tandem, checking steaming dishes, stirring,

adding spices, tasting, arranging items on trays and plates and

stopping only to exchange family holiday stories and sip at wine.

Bill Jr. and family arrived at the same time as Charlie and his

brood. Fox thought they had probably grouped together outside

and were about to storm the house like a military unit. Neither

brother was too happy to see Mulder, especially Bill, and even

though Charles was the more easy-going of the two, he had a murderous

look on his face already. Alex was going to have a hard time of it.

Not to mention Monica. Either they would be reminded of their

kooky sister Melissa or their bigotry would just expand to include

Scully's lover. The first meeting, at a crucial time like Christmas,

was bound to end in disaster. Fox hoped Alex wasn't armed. He

should have frisked him this morning before they left the house.

Maggie hugged her sons, then grandchildren and her daughters-in-law.

Charlie's three teenaged sons had dark brown hair tinged with red.

The oldest looked bored already and the middle child looked sullen.

The youngest held a video game in his hands and was still bright-eyed

with excitement.

"Mulder", Bill greeted him. His voice was full of venom. He may as

well have said "mother-fucker".

Mulder got up and shook hands with Bill Jr. That manly squeeze

that was bone-crushing or at least tendon-flattening told Mulder

Bill was not happy. He shook his hand out and ruffled the kids'

hair, one by one, until they resembled pissed-off roosters.

The youngest one smiled while the others grimaced. Riled up teens

would piss off old Bill just a tiny bit.

Charlie mumbled a greeting. His wife kicked his shin and hugged

Mulder warmly. Mulder got down to Bill's son's level and Matthew

giggled and hid behind his mother's skirt. He shyly held out his

hand. Mulder took it and wished him a merry Christmas.

They filed into the den like soldiers, Bill in front like the

commanding officer he was. He shook hands with Skinner and was

introduced to Doggett. He didn't mind shaking Skinner's hand.

It wasn't as if the former assistant director was a real queer unlike

fey Mulder. He wasn't sure about Doggett though. After all, the

man was a former marine. He probably just got used to fucking

guys when he'd been assigned overseas and maybe because of his

failed marriage he'd never tried to be with a woman due to a

psychological aberration.

Alex popped his head out of the kitchen at the commotion. He'd heard

the rest of the clan arrive. He wiped his hand on a dish towel and

marched straight up to Dana's family. She introduced him to her

brothers first. He held his hand out to Bill. His left hand. The

right still clutched the dish towel. Let the man squeeze the fuck

out of his prosthetic. Bill gave a visible shiver of revulsion and

quickly let go of Alex's fake limb. He grinned and turned to


Next were the wives and children. He shook hands with each of them

and murmured polite greetings. He used his right hand this time.

He didn't fuss over the kids. He'd been around teenagers enough

to know they hated that kind of shit. No talking down or asking

about school. No, gee you look just like your dad! Or so you

got a girlfriend yet? wink, wink, nonsense.

He excused himself to check on the meal but kept the door open to

listen for any trouble. Scully was being hugged by the lot of them.

Her brothers looked genuinely glad to see her. Charlie greeted

Monica politely and went to the sofa to play with his nephew.

The time before dinner was filled with little tense moments and

subtle maneuvers designed to put the other party on the defensive.

Bill was very good at this but then so was Mulder. Margaret's

steel backbone came into play and Monica tried to defuse the

uncomfortable situation with humor. Doggett talked about his marine

days, while Skinner alternately glared at Scully's brothers and spoke

about his work. He took particular glee in regaling them with

tales of the interrogation he'd taken part of when they'd finally

nabbed the suspect in Natalie's murder. He'd been hiding in sunny

Mexico all these months. He'd be lucky to see a little patch of blue

sky where he was being incarcerated.

The teens slouched down into the sofa to play video games and

ignore the bickering and putdowns. Matt showed Will his new toys

and they played together quietly while Dana kept watch over them.

Lunch was a brief respite but not even turkey and gravy with all the

trimmings could stop Bill from mouthing off. After a couple of full

glasses of wine his insults became bolder and his belligerence forced

the boys to retreat to the den with plates stacked with dessert and a

second helping of turkey to play video games again. Will and

Matthew had been put down for naps.

"You know I don't think this is a very good environment for my

nephew, being raised by a couple of lezzies."

Monica began to turn red as the wine in her glass. Dana turned a

shade similar and slammed her glass down on the table. Margaret

gaped with open-mouthed disdain and surprise at her son's behavior.

Charles grinned. Billy was just getting started and he'd tell Dana

what was what. Luckily their wives were out of the dining room

tending to the kids, otherwise they'd have gotten an earful or merely

murderous glances that would announce no nookie tonight.

Alex had been silent most of the time, speaking quietly only when

the conversation revolved around Mulder's x-files cases or Walter

and John's work at the FBI and their detective agency. Most of the

time he spent observing the behavior of the extended complicated

family unit. He tried to keep the peace by helping Margaret stuff

them so full of food they wouldn't want to fight, talking politely to

Dana's sisters-in-law and asking the teens about their musical


"What the hell do you do in bed anyways? It can't be much fun, sis.

You should get yourself a real man. Maybe convert old Johnny here

back to his straight self."

Alex couldn't decide which was brighter: Dana's hair or her cheeks.

John's blue eyes narrowed and his face tightened. Alex could just

imagine a fist forming under the table and he discovered he was right

when he saw Walter's hand suddenly clutch under the table and push

John down into his chair.

"That's enough out of you," Margaret scolded. "How dare you come

to my house and insult your sister and her friend in this manner, on

this day of all days?"

"Come on mom, I'm just telling the truth. She would pick someone

like Reyes. What kind of spic name is that anyways? You couldn't

find yourself some all American lesbo I suppose? No you had to

pick some kooky nut that channels spirits and carries amulets or

whatever that necklace thing is just like Missy. And speaking of

Missy, her fucking assassin is sitting at this table eating with us.

The bastard should be locked up in some filthy prison to rot the

rest of his life away." Bill stood up uncertainly, balancing his

swaying body with a hand on the table. "Traitorous bitch must

be good for something if you guys keep him around." He looked

at Skinner and Doggett pointedly. "He must be a real slut in bed

if you can ignore the fact of who he is and what he did."

Walter jumped up. The tendons in his strong neck throbbed in time

to his racing heart. He huffed his breath, ready to beat the crap

out of Bill. John had stood up as well, his lean body resembling

the tight well-trained weapon it was. Mulder stood up as well,

his body trembling with rage.

The women were silent, in shock. Margaret was on the verge of

tears, Dana's hands were clutched in her lap, the short fingernails

digging into her palms. She'd never wanted to smack someone so

hard in her life. Monica's face was white now, drained of the blood

that suffused it with outrage. She wanted to work some black magic

on the homophobe's ass and started chanting some yoga meditations

to keep the bad energy at bay.

Alex stood. He poured himself a shot of Bailey's and gulped it down.

"Guys please sit down," he said quietly.

Bill had backed away from the table at the looks on the other's faces

and was still swaying a bit from the alcohol he'd consumed.

"Bill there's been bad feelings between me and my lovers and

Dana for quite a few years. I've made my peace with all of them,

including your mother. Now I'm not saying they've forgotten what

I've done, but they have forgiven me. I'm sure you miss your sister

a great deal and I'm sorry for her death. It was tragic, as were all

the losses that Dana and Fox have suffered along with John and

Walter and yes even myself.

"I'm grateful that out of all that tragedy some good has come of it.

namely Will. His existence is a miracle.

"But your mom is right. Today is a day to celebrate and make an

effort at peace. And right I'm making an effort not to kill you."

Alex's voice strained just slightly as evidence of the rage broiling

inside of him. "So I suggest you sit down, shut up, finish eating,

quit drinking, stop behaving like an asshole and apologize to your

family for being such an ungrateful, irritating, drunken, homophobic


Alex sat down, poured himself a generous helping of Bailey's and

gave a glass to Margaret. She smiled at him and downed it in one

shot. "Good stuff," she gasped. "Thank you Alex."

"You're welcome," he muttered. He was embarrassed now at being

the center of attention.

"I'm sorry everyone," Bill apologized. His voice was barely above

a whisper. He picked up his water glass and drank until his reddened

face returned to a normal pallor.

Everyone nodded and looked at each other, then looked uncertainly

at the remains of the meal.

"Dana, maybe you and your lady friend could help clear the table and

set out dessert. We'll put the coffee on and oh by the way, maybe

you should clear off the steak knives and other sharp utensils

as well. Wouldn't want anyone to get any ideas about what to do

with old Billy here." Alex couldn't resist one last shot.

Fox gave him a lopsided smirk. Walter cleared his throat and

gave John a little nudge in the ribs. John let his knife clatter

noisily onto his plate. Dana laughed at that and the tension was


The three boys were crowded in the doorway, all wide-open eyes

and spiked hair. They all looked at Bill who was concentrating

intently on his plate. Alex shared a smile with Dana. Bill was

practically eating the pattern off the china and for the rest of

the day he didn't look anyone in the eye.


They decided to divide up the visitations. There was no way they

could see all their friends and neighbors in one day when they

traveled together.

John went to see his ex first. She was spending the holiday with

her new beau. They had a friendly drink together and a slice of

home-made fruit cake. Fox stopped by the gunmen's to share an

hour with them and drop off gifts (a DVD set of Oliver Stone movies,

some ties for John and a subscription to Hustler magazine). Alex

dropped in on Mr. Svetlov, bringing along liquid refreshment for a

gift (the finest imported Vodka). Walter stayed at home to make a

couple of phone calls to family far away, including Sharon's.

When they met up at home again John went to see Mrs. Kowalchuk

and her dozen or so cats (bringing along practical gifts-a carbon

monoxide detector due to a gas leak scare and cat treats for the

animals), Alex was in time to see Mona, Dirk and the kids before they

left for the airport, Walter snuck in an hour with Hannah and Richard

(bringing items from the Pottery Barn for her, video games for the

boys and books for dad) and Fox went to the Harper house. Jane was

dolled up in a new outfit and had make-up on, which made her look

whorish but he supposed that's how teenaged girls looked these days.

He complimented her on her new clothes but made no mention of

the cosmetics. Alex had put together a little gift pack for Jesse

from a fancy salon while Stephen got a subscription to a computer

magazine and the girls were loaded down with all manner of goodies

from gourmet chocolates to books and hair accessories.

Marcie and Jason weren't home so John ended up going back home

after finishing his duties. Alex's last stop was at Lisa's house and

he spent some time there with her before Byers came over for dinner

with his girlfriend, helping her son put together a Monster Lego set.

They regrouped at home before heading for their final stop: a quick

drink at Dinah's for her killer martinis.

After their last visit they walked home, snow falling in thick

flakes melting into their hair. Fox and Alex made the other two

laugh by running around in dizzying circles while trying to catch

the flakes on their tongues.

The late afternoon sun made one last attempt at flashing its tempered

brilliance across the drifts of snow left by the first winter storm.

The sounds of Christmas carols were carried by the wind along with

the scents of turkey dinners wafting through kitchen vents. Church

bells chimed in the distance.

They had their own little celebration in front of a roaring fire to

chase away the chill settling into the evening air. Spooky got

presents too, including squeaky chew toys and catnip. They gave

each other the usual sweaters, books, CD's, movie passes, theatre

and sports event tickets, saving the gag gifts and naughty novelties

for last. The gifts they'd brought home from Margaret's house plus

all the stops they'd made along they way included more sweaters,

scarves, ties, gloves, books, gift certificates, liquor, chocolates

(which Alex promptly put away in the cupboard so they wouldn't

tempt him), magazine subscriptions and food and spa gift baskets.

Alex looked on in anticipation as Fox opened his final box. He

undid the wrapping eagerly, smirked at Alex, wondering what could

top the Elvis tie with the tie tack that lit up and resembled a


He gasped as he pulled the box free of the tape and wrapping. "Holy

fuck!" He showed the guys his gift.

It was an alien love child. No, not the kind that the tabloids said

existed and certainly not an alien and human hybrid. It was

actually a glow-in-the-dark white s-shaped dildo with a sort of

smiling alien "face" and ribbed sides.

"Holy fuck is right and that's exactly what I'm going to give you

tonight," Alex declared. He took the box away, pulled out the

dildo and chased Fox all over the house until he caught him.

Alex liked to think that he was faster than Fox the runner, but Fox

actually let himself be caught just this one time and boy was he

glad he did!
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